Ice Cream (America)

Beer is mentioned a bit in here, even though it isnt the main focus of the story.

“…Ice cream!”


You love the frozen confection, and lucky you, there was an ice cream cart usually parked at the park across the street. You knew you had to act fast however. It was late afternoon, and with the heat index was hitting its peak and the cart would be sold out within minutes. You sprinted across the street to the tiny refrigerated cart and jumped in line, which was about ten people long. Bored and anxious you started examining the people waiting in line with you. Most of the people in line were pretty normal: a mom with a sobbing toddler, teenager with fifty piercings, old lady talking to herself, and a small group of children. The only person that really stood out to you was the man in front of you. He was tall with sandy blonde hair and was talking on the phone really loudly. But that’s not what was bothering you. The thing was, he was wearing a fur-lined, leather bomber jacket and tan pants and it was 97 F (36.1 C) outside. The man hung up the phone, and somehow produce a large cup of soda and started slurping through the straw loudly. You were just too nosy to resist questioning this. You tapped him on his shoulder and he spun around.

“Yes?” His blue eyes bore into you questioningly.

“Excuse me, but aren’t you hot?” He interrupted you before you could further explain your question.

“Yes, yes I am.” He looked rather proud about this and he put his hands on his hips.

“No, not like that.” He dropped his hands and smiled jokingly at you. “I mean, aren’t you dying? It’s boiling out here and you’re wearing that.” You pointed at his get up. He laughed obnoxiously.

“That’s why I’m getting ice cream! It’ll cool me down.”

“Ah, if you don’t mind me asking, why are you wearing it?” He grinned.

“It’s the uniform for my job!”

“What’s that?” He put his hand on his hips again.

“A hero!” He then laughed loudly and you couldn’t help but laugh with him. After he stopped laughing and you calmed down, he decided to continue the conversation. “So, does a babe like you have a name?” You raised your eyebrow at the ‘babe’ thing, but let it go.

“(Y/n). You?”

“Alfred Jones, the Hero!” You both chatted for a while, and before you knew it, it was Alfred’s turn to get ice cream. “Ice cream!” he cheered and bounced up to the old man manning the cart. He obtained his ice cream and walked off to the side. You walked up to the cart, but the old man looked at you sadly and shook his head.

“Sorry Miss, but I just sold the last ones to the fella before you.” You nodded and walked away dejectedly. You then heard a shout.

“Hey (y/n)!” You spun around to see Alfred running towards you. He stopped just before he could crash into you. “Hey Babe, I have a surprise for you!”

“What is it?” He then held out a (f/f) ice cream cone to you. Boy were you surprised. “What about…” You looked up to see him licking a vanilla ice cream cone. “Nevermind,” you took the cone. “Thanks… Alfie.” You decided that ‘Alfie’ would be good payback for calling you ‘Babe,’ he didn’t  seem to mind.

“You’re welcome Babe!” You both started across the street. “Anything for a damsel in distress!”

“You bought me ice cream, you didn’t save my life.” Just then Alfred tackled you onto the sidewalk. “What are you…” You then noticed a car implanted into the telephone pole you were in front of before Alfred had tackled you. Only one phrase could be formed in your head at the moment.

‘Well damn.’


^&^&^Timeskip^&^&^


“Yo, Al!” You shouted from the kitchen. “What did you want me to grab you again?”

“Vanilla ice cream and a Miller Light!” You grabbed the large tub of ice cream from his freezer and the can of beer from his fridge. You and him were having another sleepover. You had had one every weekend since the two of you met, but you hadn’t done anything bad. Nope, just two friends, who happened to flirt with each other constantly and had had a make out session once, hanging out. You walked up behind Alfred, who was to into his video game to notice, and smirked. You took the ice cold beer can and placed it on his neck. He jumped and paused his game. “Not cool Babe!”

“Technically it was.” You then jumped over the couch and plopped down next to him. “Serves you right for drinking this crap.” You then shoved the beer and ice cream into his chest.

“I should never of let Gilbert give you German beer.” Two weeks ago, Alfred’s ‘Prussian’ friend, Gilbert and Danish friend, Mathias came over to party with Alfred for no reason. Gilbert then forced you to drink the German beer that he brought, exclaiming that all American beer tastes like piss. You begrudgingly went along with it and, after tasting German beer, you had to agree. That was the same night both you and Alfred ended up making out in his coat closet. Alfred then passed out on the floor and you passed out on the couch. That was the only time you had ever gotten drunk and the only time you had ever seen Alfred drunk. The next morning, while you retained all of your memories, Alfred had not, and you decided to just let it go.  “He was right though.” You said pulling two spoons from your bra and handing one to him. He just stared at you for a second with a dumbfounded look and a light blush. He then focused on his quickly depleting ice cream, that you had been gorging yourself on, and dug in. You were teasing him, as usual, and he wasn’t sure if he wanted to laugh at your silliness, or kiss you on the spot. He decided to just stick with his ice cream and it was soon gone. Neither of you wanted to get up, so you just sat there, bored. You then got an idea. “Hey Alfred!” you shouted to get his attention. He looked at you and you got to work. You exhaled onto the inside of the spoon and placed it on your nose, it stuck. You then gave Alfred a funny face. He laughed at you and mimicked your trick.

“Hey, (y/n)!”

“Ya?”

“Bet’cha I can keep my spoon on my nose longer than you can!”

“You’re on!” Both of you then heated up your spoons again and stuck them on your nose.

“Ready set go!” You both shouted simultaneously. The both of you sat there for, what Alfred felt was, hours. It had only, really, been fifteen minutes when Alfred decided to cheat a bit. His first move was to try to swipe the spoon off your nose. You easily dodged him.

“Alfred!” You gasped, “cheating! Why I never!” You then faked an insulted expression and turned your head away from him. He pouted and came up with another plan. Without you noticing, he snuck behind the couch and tried to tackle you. You then dodged him again and smirked at him. “You won’t be able to get me that easily Alfie.” He stood up and dusted himself off. You were slightly disappointed when you noticed that the spoon had managed to cling to his nose through the rough landing. Alfred sighed and sat down on the other side of the couch while you leaned on the arm of your side. You didn’t notice the sly smirk on Alfreds face when he figured out the perfect plan to win, or that, shortly after, he began to slowly crawl on his hand and knees to your side of the couch. In fact, you didn’t notice he had even moved until he spoke up.

“Hey (y/n)…” You blushed bright red. Not only was his face really close to yours, but he was also almost on top of you.

“A-Alfred, aren’t you a bit too close to me for a ‘just friends’ relationship?” You barely choked that out before he smirked.

“Yes, yes I am.” He then kissed you, forcing the spoons off of both of your noses, but neither of you noticed. The only thing you noticed, beside the fact that you had subconsciously wrapped your arms around his neck, was that his mouth tasted oddly of ice cream and hamburgers.

‘What an odd flavor for ice cream.’


$%$%Epilogue$%$%

You both broke away when you heard someone speak.

“This is a human mating ritual known as kissing.” It was Tony, speaking into a camera. “It is done by two humans moving their mouths in sync with each other.” He looked over at you and Alfred, who were staring at him with shocked and embarrassed faces. “They also consider kissing as a very intimate act and are easily embarrassed when caught.” Alfred stood up and glared at Tony. “And angered when filmed.” Alfred then started to chase Tony around the house, trying to get the camera away from him, with Tony out smarting him every chance he got. You just shook your head and laughed at your silly boyfriend and your alien friend.

‘I wonder if there is any more ice cream.’